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Thursday, 27 August 2015


As usual I woke up by 5.30 in the morning forcing myself out of bed. I drank my morning tea, did my daily chores and got ready by 6.30. I remembered I had gone to bed at 1.30 AM last night and now I had to reach office by 7.30, I regretted sleeping late last night and was determined to go to bed by 10 o Clock today, I dropped my sister to her bus stop and then motioned my bike towards my office.

Every morning it was this journey that I enjoyed the most, feeling the fresh breathe of early morning. Each day I would pass through a beautiful lake, some beautiful faces and some lovely houses. But today even the beauty around was not pleasing me for I knew that eventually I had to ignore them all and stop at an ugly place where I would have to toil hard all day, bearing all the insults and shitty words that my boss throwed at me. I always waited for the  clock to strike 5 as soon as possible and spare me the ordeal of doing something that I hated so much.

As my bike was going on at its own usual pace, I began thinking, why is it that destiny forces us to do things that we don’t want to. Why Is it that people we love the most ignore our dreams and make us do things that we never ever wished too. why cannot we simply follow our dreams and be what we want to be. To go their every morning, suffer every moment and come back tired every evening…finished. Why am I living a life where there is no life, where I am not enjoying it, where I am not happy. Was my life doomed to be like this, to spend my whole day doing something that I hate rather than following my passions and doing things that I love. My mind was in a fix that day revealing my frustrations, I felt sick the way my life was shaping up, what a wretched life and then suddenly came a van in between, it was full of children…ohhh I was so lost in my thoughts, in realized and applied the brakes in vain. The road was bad, one monsoon session and it had split into its basic components i.e sand and gravel. My bike slipped and I lost control, I knew I was about to fall but their was no way I could escape, my fall was unavoidable and I fell down, just fell down as my head collided with the rough surface and I saw my specs breaking into numerous pieces before my own eyes. i laid there for a while until two uncles came and lifted me up, they took my bike to a corner. As I stood up and walked a few steps, God has again saved me from a major accident. I knew I was alright and then I felt something warm flowing above my right eyebrow, when I touched it and looked, I saw warm red blood on my finger tips. My right hand was paining, so was my right leg, there were bruises on them. One of those uncles gave me a hanky to clean away the blood that was oozing out of my forehead profusely. He asked me that where I was going and as usual advised me to drive carefully. I was happy that my bike was all well and it hadn’t sustained any damage. I was happy at the fact, that yes I was going back home for a much needed rest. I sat on my bike and began kicking it but it was in an unconscious mode and refused to wake up. The uncle standing beside me took my bike from me and gave a try. After around 15 kicks, my bike roared and was back in action, it was back again after a deep shock, Together we have overcome an accident. This was the fourth one now. I happily drove back home enjoying my way back home, though my head pained and everytime I used the clutch, mu hand would scream in pain but even in this dismal state, my heart was smiling. As I reached home, I called my Manager and said, I won’t be coming today….MET WITH AN ACCIDENT….

Tuesday, 18 August 2015


My sister missed her school bus that day, I took my bike out and dropped her to school. Since it was a monsoon morning, it was quite refreshing to feel the water droplets hanging around as I rode my bike. The air around was a bit foggy making the atmosphere around quite mysterious, and to go back home in this sexy weather would have been an insult to Mother Nature. So I decided to strawl around and let Mother Nature reveal it’s mystery to me.

I don’t know why but I took my bike to that old park where we used to meet during those afternoon hours during our good old days when we were together madly in love with each other. She would come here after her classes got over and I would come after my dance practice got over.  That’s how we used to meet. Just outside the gate, she would always wait for me sitting on her activa listening to songs, i would always be late by around 10-15 minutes. She would fake some angry expressions and threaten me that she is going back , I would promise her that I would be on time the next time.  She would forgive me as always, and then she will roll her arms around mine and together matching our steps together, we would enter the park. Walking towards our favorite bench that was usually hidden in the shadow of trees surrounding it, by walking on a path covered with dead leaves, twigs and flowers, we would reach their resting our haunches on it. We would sit there for hours lost in each other’s arms kissing, smooching and feeling each other. We would talk, open our heart out and share our emotions. At times we would simply sit there resting onto each other staring into open space.  

There was peace……..wowww….beautiful moments…ohhh where is that bench ? I couldn’t see it, I looked around but it was nowhere to be found, the place where the bench stood was now an open space covered with grass and creepers. I asked the gardener there, he said, he is new here and knows nothing about it. I felt weird, even after she had left me and had walked out my life, I still used to come here to this very place, sit over here and used to relish those moments feeling her beautiful presence near me.

But now that bench was no more, the park though existed but the place where we used to sit was no more. Even fate, life and destiny were pointing out that in this world, our relationship no more existed and has become a thing of past, time has uprooted it and in place of it has grown grasses and creepers of memories that still occupy my mind, my heart, my soul. I need to move on revealed Mother Nature to me and as I walked back towards the gate, 

I noticed a girl in school uniform sitting in a corner, anxiously waiting for someone…..may be her lover….i just smiled thinking something and went my way….there was wetness in the atmosphere…there was wetness in my eyes…

Thursday, 13 August 2015


A Man runs into an old friend who had somehow never been able to make it in life.”I should give him some money,” he thought. But instead he learns that his old friend has grown rich and is actually seeking him out to repay the debts he had run up over the years.

They go to a bar they used to frequently go together, and the friend buys drinks for everyone there. When he asks him how he became so successful, he answers that until only a few days ago, he had been living the role of the “other”.

“What is the other?”, he asked.

His friend replied,” the other is the one who taught me what I should be like , but not what I am. The other believes that it is our obligation to spend our entire life thinking about how to get our hands on as much money as possible so that we will not die of hunger when we are old. So we think so much about money and our plans for acquiring it that we discover we are alive only when our days on earth are practically done. and then its too late.”

And you ? who are you. he asked.
His friend replied, “ I am just like everyone else who listens to their heart: a person who Is enchanted by the mystery of life. Who is open to miracles, who experiences joys and enthusiasm for what they do. It’s just that the other, afraid of disappointment, kept me from taking action”.

“But there is suffering in life,” He said.

“ And there are defeats. No one can avoid them, but it’s better to lose some of the battles in the struggle for your dreams than to be defeated without ever knowing what you are fighting for.”

“that’s it?,” he asked to his friend.

“yes, that’s it. when I learned this, I resolved to become the person I had always wanted to be. The other stood there in the corner of my room, watching me, but I will never let the other into myself again -  even though it has already tried to frighten me, warning me that it’s too risky not to think about future.



Wednesday, 12 August 2015


Sometimes an uncontrollable sadness grips us. We recognize that the magic moment of the day has passed and that we have done nothing about it. life begins to conceal its magic and art.

We have to listen to the child we once were, the child who still exists inside us. That child understands magic moments. We can stifle it cries, but we cannot silence its voice.

The child we once were is still there. Blessed are the children, for theirs is the kingdom of Heaven.

If we are not reborn - if we cannot learn to look at life with innocence and enthusiasm of childhood, it makes no sense to go on living.

We have to pay attention to what the child in our heart tells us. we should not be embarrassed by this child. We must not allow this child to be scared because the child is alone and is almost never heard.

We must allow the child to take the reins of our lives. The child knows that each day is different from every other day. We have to allow it to feel loved again. We must please this child, even if it means that we act in ways we are not used to, in ways that may seem foolish to others.

Human wisdom is madness in the eyes of GOD. If we listen to the child who lives in our soul, our eyes will go bright. If we do not lose contact with the child in us, we will not lose contact with life. Never ever and each day would surprise us…….. 

Tuesday, 11 August 2015


After a long gap of almost 15 years, we met each other finally. The meeting place was the same old park where we used to meet and play during our childhood and teen days. The park hadn’t changed much except that some benches were added rest everything was the same though things there had become old and fragile with time. we had changed a lot in all this years, from careless teens we had turned into mature individuals who feared the society and people around them. Childhood friends we were, who became great buddies during our teens, our’s was a friendship that could have blossomed into a love story but failed to do so because may be we both feared of getting rejected and losing all those moments of friendship that we had accumulated in all this years. Our friendship lasted for almost 12 years till I left my city to pursue my dreams. We lost connect and almost forgot each other until facebook resurrected our friendship and we were back again chatting, teasing each other, remembering those good old times in our conversations. In all this years away from, I realized she was my first love, a 1000 times my heart confessed it, I could never forget her. I knew in all the games we played and of all the time we had spent together, I had fallen in love with her unknowingly. I could never say that to her, never had the guts to admit it and lost the battle of love without fighting it.

And now here we were back again, in all this years things had changed so much, she was going through a broken marriage, she parted ways with her husband a year ago and in all this years I fell in love several times, broke my heart every time and now I was back to her again, to test whether the confessions of my heart were true or just mere illusions of a lonely heart.

She was standing before me and all these years had transformed her into a woman. Though she lost her innocence and her cute childish smile, her eyes remained the same as ever, deep and wet as if hidden within them were a 1000 tales of sorrow and pain. She looked beautiful though and in her now was a rare attraction that drew me towards her.

I took her near a bench and asked her to take a seat, she refused and said, first let’s have a walk and go to our church, I want to pray. I said, ok and together we walked to the nearby church. This was the same church where we together lighted so many candles, offered so many prayers during our childhood and teens. This was the same place that gave us hope during times of despair and we were back here after so many years and that too together. Was it a coincidence or a sign from Heavenly Father?.

We lighted candles before the grotto of Mother Mary and knelt down and prayed, i prayed to give me strength to confess my feelings to her and I trembled with the very thought of getting rejected by her but somewhere from an unknown corner of my heart came a ray of hope. We stood up as we were done with our prayers. I asked her what she had prayed for, she said well I am not telling you that and smiled.  We came out of the holy place and walked straight to a nearby cafĂ©.

I sat there looking at her, she looked into my eyes and I looked into her and my heart said, this is the moment, go ahead, say it. “ I want to give you something,” I said and I took out a red pouch that I had kept with me for all this years and gave it to her. She looked at me and asked, “ what is it”. I said, open it for yourself and see.

She opened it and in it was an old rosary, with black beads and a cross hanging to it. She gave me a surprised look.

It’s yours, I revealed. My heart began to beat fast, and I felt it. but ignoring it I began, One day it was autumn, just like it is now, and we must have been 16 then, I was sitting with you on a bench in the same park where we stood some moments ago.

“I was going to tell you something, something I had rehearsed for weeks. But as soon as I began, you told me that you had lost your rosary at the church, the same church where we prayed some moments ago. And then you asked me to see if I could find it there.”

She looked at me amazed and said, oh yes I do, I remember that day very well, I remember it and yes you never found it, you said.

“I did find it, but when I returned back back, I no longer had the courage to say what I had rehearsed. So I promised myself that I would return your rosary to you only when I was able to complete the sentence that I would began that day almost 15 years ago. For a long time I have tried to forget it, but it’s always there. I can’t live with it any longer.” I confessed.

From her look, I could make out that she had sensed what I was about to say but she still asked, and what was it that you wanted to say.
I put down my coffee, lit a cigarette and looked at the ceiling for a long time. then I turned to her and said,” it’s a very simple sentence, ” I love you”. that was all I wanted to say.

She sat there staring at me, I smiled at her and winked. Finally I had spoken the truth to her….aaaaah I felt so relieved….

Saturday, 8 August 2015


Does a leaf, when it falls from the tree in winter, feel defeated by the cold?

The tree says to the leaf: ‘ That’s the cycle of life. You may think you’re going to die, but you live on in me. It’s thanks to you that I’m alive, because I can breathe. It’s also thanks to you that I have felt loved, because I was able to give shade to the weary traveler. Your sap is in my sap; we are one thing.’

Does a man who spent years preparing to climb the highest mountain in the world feel defeated when, on reaching that mountain, he discovers that nature has cloaked the summit in storm clouds? The man says to the mountain: ‘you don’t want me this time , but the weather will change and, one day, I will make it to the top. Meanwhile , you’ll still be here waiting for me.’

Does a young man, rejected by his first love, declare that love does not exist? The young man says to himself: ‘ I’ll find someone better able to understand what I feel. And then I will be happy for the rest of my days.’

In the cycle of nature there is no such thing as victory or defeat: THERE IS ONLY MOVEMENT.

Thursday, 6 August 2015


But her eyes were still open staring at him constantly thinking about him, she was madly in love with him now and his thoughts and all that perspired between them kept her awake….. …his touch, his warmth, his smell all was enough to make her go weak between her thighs. She wanted all that to begin again, she wanted him to wake up and do all those wonderful things he did some moments ago. She wanted him inside her, she wanted him to make love to her, she so badly wanted him for all his life. How wonderful life would be with him ? finally she had got her prince charming and at that very moment she felt like the most happiest woman. He looked at him, he was sleeping in peace, he looked so innocent, so cute. By his face no one could say that some moments ago he made her have multiple orgasms. He made her moan with ecstasy and now this devil was sleeping in peace….stupid…idiot….she whispered. He was still sleeping in peace and here she was lying beside him completely restless. It was 5.45 AM showing on the clock.

And now the hunger to feel him inside her was unbearable. She started caressing him with her fingers, playing with his hair locks, making ways on his body, running her hands down till his stomach. The beast was sleeping and how she dearly wanted him to wake up and devour her. Her hard work bore fruit as he opened his eyes puzzled to see her behaving like this, what is it ? what happened? You didn’t sleep?.  She looked at him and said, “no I didn’t”, he was even more puzzled and asked her, “ why”, because I couldn’t , she said. Her voice was shaking and she was breathing heavily, he could see her eyes burning with passion ready to eat him up. Without waiting for a second, She came near him and gave a peck on his lips and now he knew, what was it that kept her awake, he came near her and he kissed her, now their tongues were licking each other passionately. They were exploring each other inch by inch, as they peeled off their clothes that covered their beautiful bodies. They fed on each other as they were hungry for each other all this years, it was just that they were away from each other for reasons unknown and they were making love with each other this moment, for reasons unknown. Some things happen spontaneously, they happen naturally, you don’t force them to happen, they just do.

He looked at her and she looked at him with love and hope, she is was ready to take him inside her.  She closed her eyes and felt the tip of his manhood at her most private part, he pushed it hard into her and this time he made no mistake, he had hit the right spot. In one push it went half into her and she gave a loud moan, he started the thrust very slowly at first and then started taking speed. Unlike the last time which was a painful experience, she was enjoying it now. With every thrust she moaned with ecstasy. For him he felt like heaven, her hole was such a warm place giving him pleasure that he couldn’t define. He continued his thrusts and she continued her moans and then after a while she felt like his organ was increasing in size within her and all of a sudden his body was stiffened, he held her tightly such that her breasts got pressed with his chest and cummed deep within her, filling her with his warm semen. He laid beside her panting for breath and she laid their completely exhausted . He felt like a king who had just won a battle and she felt like a queen who got her King back after years of separation. She had loved him for so many years and now she finally had him. it was a long wait but was worth it, they both looked at each other and smiled. Both knew they were madly in love with each other and now nothing else mattered. Together they will make their own world, a world of happiness and love.

They checked the time it was 6.45. Perhaps this morning was different, the dawn of love had come after a long night of friendship and by the time it was 2 pm, they were making love with each other for the fourth time….

The end…..